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An Open Letter to the Annie Leibovitz Coffee Table Book, Pilgrimage
Dear Pillie: Let me start by saying, you are GORGEOUS. You’re 245 pages of heavy stock, hardbound photographic magic, without question the most stunning thing in my living room. When I heard Neal...
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An Open Letter to the African Tribal Statue in My New Neighbor’s Picture Window
Hello. I come in peace. I hope you enjoy the traditional suburban offering of chocolate chip cookies that I left with this letter on the sidewalk in front of your residence; I figured you’d be able to...
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An Open Letter to Grandma’s Harp
Dear Harpy: There you sit, in the corner of my dining room, a one hundred year old beauty in a state of Miss Haversham disrepair. Your sinuous curves, outlined to great advantage with thin scrolls of...
View ArticleAn Open Letter to the Handybook App
Dear Handybook App: Hi, how are you? See, that first sentence is what we humans like to call, “being friendly.” Sure, it’s got a tinge of insincerity – I mean, if you’re buggy, if you’re running slow,...
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An Open Letter to the Restoration Hardware Returns Department
Dear Restoration Hardware: I wanted to let you know that I mistakenly received an item I did not order from your catalog, and wondered if you could send someone by my house to pick it up. It is a...
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An Open Letter to the Selfie-Stick Wielding Tourists on Alcatraz
Dear Adorable Young Couple: Last Sunday our paths crossed on a rock in the middle of San Francisco Bay: specifically, Alcatraz, the federal-prison-turned-federal-park that sits, foreboding yet...
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An Open Letter to Multitasking Man
Dear Multitasking Man: Three nights out of seven (five during Nutcracker season) I drive my two ballerinas down the winding, sloping streets of our neighborhood to their dance studio at precisely 5:50...
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An Open Letter to Technology
Dear Technology: In writing this week’s Open Letter to Multitasking Man, I glanced back at the Open Letters tag in my blog archive and realized: I sound like a technology crank. Whether it’s my...
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An Open Letter to My Getaround User
Hi buddy! You don’t know me, but we’re connected thanks to this newfangled car-sharing service called Getaround. I was intrigued by the description of “peer-to-peer car sharing” which basically means...
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Loads of Distractions
A basket of puppies to apply medicinally as needed In the past 72 hours the best way I’ve had to shake off my anxiety is to pick up a book that’s coming out in June called The Chicken Sisters, by my...
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